Have you decided that receiving sexual energy means that you 1) are obligated to have sex with that person, 2) that you are inviting rape or sexual abuse, 3) that you are bad and being inappropriate, 4)… 5)…, 6)… you get the point…
These were my reasons for ‘fearing’ sex and my own sexual energy – what are yours?
Let me tell you about an experience I had a few years ago that CHANGED this for me forever.
I was walking in a park in Oakland one Sunday. I was enjoying the nature and playing with the earth which always turns my body on. Typically I tamper it down as it seems to invite a lot of interest. Not today.
I received stares from all ages and genders. I received whistles. I received one guy flipping his head around so fast as his bike passed me that he bumped into a car. I even received a man inviting me to have sex with him in the public bathroom! Typically this kind of attention – especially that last invitation – would have me running for shelter. Again not today.
Things were changing. Working with the tools of Access Consciousness I had demanded that I trust myself. I was done with shutting down and hiding from sex. I was done with feeling like I had no choice in the matter. I was trusting that it was ok to be sexual, receive the energy and interest which my body so enjoys AND that I could protect myself if needed. Protection not through force but through awareness.
On my way back to my car I was bending over admiring someone’s garden and my gut spoke to me. It twisted quickly and I had the awareness to “get big.” This is an Access tool – expand out to make yourself invisible don’t contract to make yourself smaller. Smaller you = bigger target…
I turned to see a beat up car driving by with men in it that I KNEW were up to no good.
I didn’t shut down or off – I just expanded further.
I started walking with a quickened step and more directionality to get out of there.
A few blocks later I heard a women scream and saw her run out in the road to flag down a passing car.
The men my awareness told me to get away from had tried to grab her and put her in their car.
They didn’t even see me…
To go from receiving and inviting all that sexual attention and energy just a few moments earlier to not even being seen by men who were looking for a victim CHANGED everything for me.
I KNEW from that moment on that I could trust my awareness. That I had to listen to myself. And that it was OK to receive sexual energy without an expectation of what it meant or what may be expected of me. That I have the choice for what I create with myself and my body.
What if you didn’t have to wall off sexual energy for fear of being unsafe?
What if you started to trust your awareness and got the hell out of situations when your gut said to?
What if by stepping more into your sexual energy you not only receive and gift more healing and nurturing but also invite a HIGHER level of awareness of when a difference choice is required?
We will be exploring this and SO much more in my upcoming Orgasmic Revolution: Embracing the Joy of Embodiment in Sex and Beyond classes. I’m booking more classes around the world. Please contact me if you are interested in having me come to your town.
San Franciso: Febraury 28
Chicago: May 1 – 3
What else is possible?
Ease and Joy,
Lauren